Dear Advice Chick,
The (really long) Basketball Player Drama Part 2
Okay so his high school sweetheart was there and I don’t really like to call people ugly so I will just say she was not a cute girl. At the party I was sitting with his aunt and he was off talking to some of his friends. No big deal they hadn’t seen him in a while so the high school sweetheart comes over and ask the aunt who is he talking to because he was speaking to some girl and the aunt said she knew her and the sweetheart was like don’t cover for him so the aunt said “ You are old school” then she went to go sit down. Later after the party they had a get together at a hotel and we were they drinking on the way to the hotel I was telling him that some girl was asking about him but I didn’t know who it was and I asked was he sleeping with someone there. Then I asked was his high school sweetheart there and what did she look like. Since he played b-ball in high school I was expecting him to at least have a cute girlfriend. I was shocked to know the girl with the jay leno chin and jack o lantern teeth was actually his girlfriend in high school. Yuck!
I said were you just sleeping with her because no girl is going to do all that for nothing. He said he hadn’t slept with her since she had a baby and the baby by another man was like 16 months old. So we walk into the hotel room and she is there and he is eating an apple and she is like, “ look at you trying to be good.” I just laugh and keep walking in. So we are in the hotel room and I sit on the bed. By the way it was Me, him, high school ho, her sister, their friend, and one other guy. So we are drinking and I am talking to the guy because the high school sweetheart is acting dumb first she said She want some “ insert ball player’s last name” then she stopped herself before she could finish it then she said let me stop his girl is in here. I said there is nothing you can say that will offend me. I am a grown woman and I am from DC I have heard it all. What was I to say I am not going to argue with her over a man. He wasn’t in the room when this was said. He kept walking in and out of the room so he missed some things. Then she says a few minutes shaking her head to one of her friends that she just doesn’t know how to deal with this. I mean really! Deal with what you two dated in high school and you have a baby get over it.
SO anyway I am talking to one of his friends and I ask if he was from there. He said yeah but lives in Boston and I said oh because you don’t sound like you are from down here. So the high school sweetheart’s sister chimes in and is like “ so we do” we sound country? Though I wasn’t talking to her but I wasn’t going to back down I said “ well yeah you look country” SO she is like so what do city girls look like ? You? I said yes. So she said well I am glad I am country and I said I am glad I am city/ I didn’t think it was that serious I thought it was rather humorous. So then my date tells me that I am a trouble maker as he is laughing. I keep laughing. So we were all there drinking and the high school ho was like how are you getting home to my date she is like I am going to get gray hairs worrying about you. I just laugh I really don’t have time to argue with a woman over a man but I am heated because I feel he brought me down to make these girls jealous. So the night progresses and they are preparing to leave I didn’t realize they were still mad because I called them country so I say goodnight and drive safe. The next day at the picnic before the guy and I arrive they told everyone I called them country so throughout the day I hear I am proud I am country. It was really ridiculous I didn’t think I had hurt their feelings with the comment. No I take that back I knew I did but so what look how they had been acting all night and I didn’t even know that they asked him where I was staying when I wasn’t around. This is like the rkelly drama they are so many more chapters to this. I asked him seriously when was the last time you were with this girl because this doesn’t make sense for her to act this way and why didn’t you tell me he said that was almost 10 years ago so he didn’t fell he had to explain me to her or her to me since that was almost 10 years ago. But going by this I was used as trophy date and to piss off a high school ex is what it seems like to me. Before I was leaving his aunt asked when he was coming to see me and he said he didn’t know. I have talked to him since then we laughed about the situation we actually laughed about it then. I am not really sure. I guess I should take it day by day. Also I called but then he didn’t call me so after a week of not hearing from me he was calling to find out why I haven’t been calling him. What do you think about this situation and what should I do?
Advice Chick replies,
Like I said in my initial reply before I knew the details, I believed he wanted to have a trophy to show off at his Alumni events. After reading part 2 of the BBall Player Drama, I also firmly believe he used you to make his old girlfriend jealous.
It’s sweet that you’re attractive and all that, but it seems that he may be still interested in his ex, and seriously used you to make her jealous. By your own admission the phone calls have gone from talking almost daily to not talking for weeks on end.
You’re lucky his ex and her girls didn’t whoop your ass or worse. Looks like he took your DIME piece ass and made change.
But wait! There’s more! Look for the Basketball Drama Part 3 in Thursday’s column.
Dear Advice Chick,
I wrote you before about online dating. I appreciated your advice, and even looked at several profiles on a dating site. I didn’t post my own ad yet, but I think I will. Last week I saw an interesting program called “Hooking Up.” It was on ABC and showed several women during some online dates! It was interesting and frightening at the same time. Did you see it? If you did, what did you think of it? Was it realistic, or made up?
Advice Chick replies,
I think ABC has a hit with Hooking Up! I watched the first episode last week, and will watch the remaining four. The dates seemed to be very realistic. There was the usual lying about one’s occupation, the posting of the older-than-a-motha-fukka photo, (one guy posted a pic of himself that was FIFTEEN years old!), the unrealistic expectations, and the occasional connection.
Hooking Up depicts what happened in the live of 11 females over the course of a year. Though your experience may have some similarities, it won’t be the same. Yes you might meet an ax murderer, but you might meet an ax murderer at the coffee joint too. A good dose of intuition, coupled with common sense will help you be as safe as possible during your online dating experiences. If you guys want specific online dating safety tips, let me know and I’ll provide them in a future column.
There are good people online too. I’ve been involved with this singles thing for many years, and even dated a few guys that I’d met online. I’ve hosted several online communities over the years and have met many of the people from them. 99% of them were good people. No risk, no reward. Go for it; you might meet a person to share the rest of your life with. Hooking up airs Thursday’s at 9 EST on ABC. Visit http://www.hookingup-singles.com for show reviews, updates, and resources for singles.
