By the end of this page, you'll be closer to getting the date of your
dreams. Seriously! Read on... and just imagine the fun you could have with
your new-found dating skills.
1. Do you know exactly what you want from your date, and from dating? It's good for you to have a goal to work towards.
In any walk of life, as soon as we have a firm idea of what we want to do,
we find it much easier to get there.
Are you looking for a lifelong partner, are you interested in making a
friend and then seeing where it goes from there? Are you perhaps looking for
casual fun? Hot sex? A phone number, or just the memory of a great night.
Visualize that perfect outcome, hear what your date says when it's gone just
the way you wanted it to go, and allow yourself to feel just how good it is
to know that everything could go this well.
As you get a really clear picture in your mind of exactly what you want from
your date, you may be aware of feeling closer to it happening.
2. Here's the secret behind dating success. The best daters in the world, the ones who achieve what they really want,
whether it's finding the perfect partner, or playing the field successfully,
have something in common. They're not afraid to try, and try again.
Not everybody out there is going to be right for you. If, after a date, you
don't want to take it any further, that is a success! When it happens, ask
yourself what you've learnt, congratulate yourself and move on. This is one
of the most important things I can tell you.
You remember the old game show saying, you've got to be in it to win it! Well
you have, with dating.
3. Now the fun stuff. Some instant body language and verbal techniques you can use which will make a big difference. Did you know? Big pupils are scientifically proven to be more attractive
than small pupils. This is an incredible one, not only do we perceive
someone with big pupils to be attractive, our pupils get bigger when we are
attracted to somebody as well.
Artificially making your pupils large the whole time may well be completely
impossible. But you can change the conditions. Just reduce the light on your
date. Going to a low-lit bar or restaurant, going outdoors in the evening,
or having a candlelit dinner. And of course, if you are already attracted to
your date, chances are your pupils are already big and black!
Now, Signs that your date is keen: A girl playing with her hair, is
interested! A guy sitting with his legs spread wide apart, is interested!
You can look out for these signs, and you can use them yourself as well -
your date will unconsciously pick up on them! Isn't it amazing that your
unconscious mind was aware of these signs but your conscious mind wasn't -
until now? The girl, playing with her hair, the guy, legs spread wide apart.
And how you hold your drink says so much. A still hand, perhaps lightly
touching or caressing the glass, is a sign of calmness. Tapping your fingers
though, may make it look like you're impatient, and it may mean your date is
impatient if they're doing it. Avoid lots of unnecessary itching, tapping,
scratching, pulling, and hand and finger movement. And don't pull the
stickers off beer bottles.
Now, to what you say. How good would it be to subtly link yourself with your
dates best ever experiences? Well you can... with questions. "Who in your
life makes you feel happiest?" "Tell me about your last holiday?" "What do
you look for in an ideal partner?"
All these questions will evoke positive feelings in your date, positive
feelings which they will subconsciously link to you! It's true, give it a
week, and watch your dating success rate shoot up!
4. Confidence.
By reading this, you're on the way to achieving the quality which is a
bigger turn-on than any other.
Confidence. In a recent survey, Confidence was rated the number one most attractive
trait. Not looks, or sense of humor.. Confidence.
Confidence is about self respect and self understanding. It comes from
understanding who you are, and what you are about. And knowing what you
want. That's why I've already done work on what you want from your date. And
that's why for real confidence, it's vital to feel good about yourself. Feel
good about yourself, and your date will feel good about you.
And for more on confidence, maybe you'd like to listen to Dating Confidence
In 30 minutes, at my website www.thescienceofdating.com.
About the author.
Tony Wrighton presents drivetime on the North-West's biggest commercial
radio station, 105.4 Century FM. He is an NLP practitioner, specializing in
body language, communication, and hypnosis skills, and hosts a speed-dating
night in Manchester. He has been on hundreds of dates and only wishes he'd
always known what he knows now.
