How to Tell If He’s Just Not That Into You
By Jeff Cohen, freelance writer (cohenwriting@aol.com)
He's Just Not That Into You! Thanks to Sex and the City and the best selling book by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo, it’s a phrase uttered by singles everywhere. But how can you really tell if you’re dating a quality guy or if it’s time to move on?
Here’s seven surefire signs that your guy is just not that into you. If three or more of these signs are true in your relationship it may be time to find a guy who can better appreciate what you have to offer.
1) He constantly talks about ex-girlfriends
There is nothing wrong with discussing your past. However, there’s a difference between infrequent and constant references to an ex-girlfriend. If your guy is always referring to an ex-girlfriend, isn’t it possible he’s not really over her yet? If that’s the case, then maybe he’s not focused on making your relationship work together.
2) He never talks about your future together
We’re not talking about ultimatums here. This is not about demanding an engagement ring. But if you’ve been with your guy for several months and he never talks about the future, then how do you know you have one together? At the very least, he should be capable of discussing monogamy and love. Otherwise, he’ll never be ready for engagement, marriage, and starting a family.
3) He’s all take and no give
In a perfect relationship, each partner is 100% focused on giving to the other person. That way, everyone is giving and getting 100%. Your relationship doesn’t have to be perfect, but if your guy is all take and no give, then he’s flat out selfish. Eventually you’ll get tired of being there for him and resentment will kick-in. That’s no way to exist in a relationship.
4) He displays tremendous jealousy or insecurity
If your guy is insecure about your every move or jealous of every other guy in your life, then your relationship is destined for trouble. If you’re being flirtatious with other men, then your guy has a right to be upset. But if it’s all going on in his head, then there’s a problem. Without trust, two people can’t coexist in a relationship.
5) He makes plans last minute or cancels on you
Guys who are not into you always love to call on Friday to land a date for Saturday. You know it’s because they’re waiting to see if anything better comes along. Hold your ground on this one. If your guy calls last minute or cancels last minute, then you’re not his number one priority.
6) He’s a drunk dialer
The only thing worse than making plans last minute is making plans from the bar after a few drinks. If your guy is calling you for a hook-up after guzzling some Corona’s at the local bar, then he doesn’t view you as girlfriend material. Rather he sees you as someone to have fun with when he strikes out at the bar.
7) He won’t call you his girlfriend
Your guy will have plenty of chances to introduce you at parties, with friends, and at social functions. If he stumbles on how to introduce you, never flat out calling you his girlfriend, then you’re not his girlfriend. At least not in his mind. Pay attention if he uses phrases like “my good friend” because they provide insights into his thinking about the relationship.
Now that you’re armed with these seven surefire tips, check them against your boyfriend. If he’s falling short on more than a few from this list, then he’s falling short in your relationship. That means it’s time to be honest with yourself and decide if you still want to be his girlfriend.
Jeff Cohen is the author of the e-book, 30 Minute Guide to Online Dating. It's a must-read for anyone looking to master the art of online dating without wasting hours of valuable time. To learn more about the e-book and purchase a copy, please visit Online Dating eBook.
|
