“Thanks for the great evening, I’ll you call you later!” Yeah, uh-huh, right! If I had a dime for every time I heard that, I’d be telling Mr. Trump that HE’S fired!
Doesn’t it make you want to jump off the nearest cliff every time you hear, “Oh, I’ll call you?” You have a great evening, you laugh, you make fun of people, and your both of your fathers have the same first name. What else could be more perfect? So the next day you patiently wait for the phone to ring. But, surprise! Three days later, no phone calls. Four weeks pass and you’re still trying to figure out why your incredibly hot date hasn’t called.
If you had a rotten time, a call usually isn’t expected. But when you have a wonderful evening, it’s kind of a shock when your phone lays in a coma induced state for eons. Maybe their spouse wouldn’t let them go out alone any more. Who knows. But as each minute goes by, we go through the dreaded “What did I do wrong?” scenario. “What’s wrong with me?” “I’m not pretty enough.” “I don’t have a fancy enough car.” Or “Maybe McDonald’s wasn’t the best place to go on the first date.”
We beat ourselves up so much, we look worse than Mike Tyson on an off day. STOP IT! It hurts, and we get our egos bruised, but move on! You don’t have to send hate letters, or make a zillion phone calls wanting to know what happened. Most of us, especially us ladies, need closure, even if we only had one date. Why? What difference does it make? Delete and move on.
The main reason why he or she didn’t call back was because they weren’t interested! (Or her weekend pass at the psychiatric unit expired.) There’s a possibility you may have been ‘accidentally’ deleted, but if they don’t respond after say, fifty emails, I’d call it a day. If someone wants to get together again, believe me, they would move heaven and earth to make that happen. They would find the time. They would travel the distance. And they would definitely wax their lips or wax their Porsche for ya!
So, what DO you say at the end of the date when you know you never want to see him again? “Sorry, Charlie, go crawl back into that hole you came out of and leave me alone!?” Nope. You say, “I had a great time, I’ll call you later.” UUUGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!! Why can’t we be like any four-year-old and tell them how we really feel? Why? Cuz most of us don’t want to hurt people’s feelings, so this is the easy way out. Okay, I admit, I’ve done it myself, but now I kindly say, “I had a nice evening, thanks so much, and take care.” Then run to your car…fast!
Most people sense how their date went. Their body language, the scowl on their date’s face, or the fact they never returned from the restroom. But if you are a good actor, and pretended like you had a good time, simply tell them you enjoyed yourself, but you didn’t feel there was any chemistry or connection. Leave the hate emails in your ‘Draft/Never EVER Send’ folder.
As Mom used to always say, “Don’t dwell on the past, your pain will only last.” So go out and make your day!! That’s an order!
Internet dating expert and author, Bev (Jarvis) Bacon, grew up and spent the majority of her ‘dating’ life in Kettering, Ohio. After several years of online dating, she realized that a different strategy was needed dating ‘this way’. Through her own personal experience, she feels she’s made all the mistakes so YOU don’t have to! Her book, “Meet Me…Don’t Delete Me!” explains what you can do to improve your chances of NOT being deleted in the process. Bev currently lives in Los Angeles.
